How to talk to your child about divorce

Most married couples will readily admit that there have been times when they did not know if their marriage would last. Both partners often need to work very hard to ensure that the relationship continues to grow. When they experience difficult times, they find a way to address the real issues of concern so that they can be resolved in a positive way.

For those who decide that things are not going to work, they might seriously start thinking about all options, including divorce. For those that have children, the process can become even more complicated. The increased interactions with the other side can add to the stress levels that they may be feeling.

It can be extremely difficult for couples to talk to their children about divorce. Some kids may not be old enough to actually understand what is happening. They may know just enough to be confused by the changes, and could have a very hard time with the transition. Older children might have a better idea of what divorce means, but not know why it is happening to their mom and dad. They might try to think the divorce is their fault, and blame themselves for their parents splitting up.

When the couple decides that it is time to end the marriage, they need to be sure that they talk to their children about how this will change the amount of time that they get to spend with each parent. The parties need to commit to keeping the discussions positive, and not bad-mouth the other parent in front of the child. Putting the kids in the middle of the divorce in such a way will only increase the amount of tension the child is feeling, and can make the adjustment period that much more challenging for everyone involve.

Children need to know that they are not responsible for the breakdown in the marriage. They should be told that each parent still loves them and wants to be a part of their lives. While it might be hard to work through all the issues happening during such an emotionally intense time, keeping focused on the best interests of the children is extremely important.

If you are considering filing for divorce and have children with your spouse, you need to discuss your situation with an experienced family law attorney. Many people often try to work out custody agreements on their own, and discover mistakes once the agreement has been finalized. These issues can create serious problems, and could result in one party losing access to the child.

Do not let yourself be taken advantage of at this time. You need to be sure that you have someone looking out for you, and helping you advance your custody and visitations concerns. Your attorney can help you find the right agreement for you and your child.